Monday, October 5, 2009

Dominatrix Housewives: Eva Longoria

Recently we profiled actress Teri Hatcher, whose long legs and tendency to incite public bootworship among Hollywood elites has caught the eye even of the vanilla press. (For the Hatcher profile, please click here.) But Hatcher isn't the only as an in-episode or real-life femdom on the cast of Desperate Housewives — not by a long shot.

Consider the kinky cuckholdings of Housewife co-star Eva Longoria. In recent months, Ms. Longoria has reportedly cracked the verbal and conjugal whip repeatedly on her submissive French husband, basketball star Tony Parker, whom Longoria treats in the bedroom as an eager but "fumbling schoolboy" (Longoria, during a 2007 photo shoot) when it comes to serving the needs of his dominant wife.

"I'm the teacher," she told the press at one point during their courtship. (For a news report, click here.) Speaking to friends more recently, she added, "Tony's learning -- but he knows who's in charge."

Longoria's recent poses for both Citizen K magazine and Mexican GQ ( for photos, click here) and Citizen K magazines, in fact, were meant in part to reassure friends in the Hollywood femdom community -- such as Longoria mate Victoria Beckham, also a femdom -- that her jock-by-day domestic partner knows who the crotch-sniffer is at night.

(From a vanilla press item dated May 19, 2009: "Friends of the Eva Longoria say she is definitely the more dominant person in her relationship. A source added: 'Eva wears the trousers in the relationship and if she wants a baby, chances are that Tony won't have much say in the matter.' " Click here for more details.)

Hatcher and Longoria. moreover, may only scratch the surface of Wistiria Lane Asphixiatrixes. Who could forget, for example, the guest appearance by Sharon Lawrence as dominatrix in the December 19, 2004 episode of the series, "Come Back to Me"?

Indeed, there's enough material from the vixens of Housewives and their saucy screentwriters — led by Jeff Greenstein — to justify more than one installment of the Celebrity Dominatrix blog.

Meantime, here's a little bone to chew on, tossed out courtesy of Mrs. Longoria-Parker. Want to see more? We won't try to whip it out of you, boys. But you might have to join Tony on the floor and bark like a dog.